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All of the following are said to be true stories.. you decide!

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The controller working a busy pattern told the 727 on downwind to make a 360 (do a complete circle, usually done to provide spacing between aircraft).

The pilot of the 727 complained, 'Do you know it costs us two thousand dollars to make a 360 in this airplane?'

Without missing a beat the controller replied, 'Roger, give me four thousand dollars worth.'

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PSA was following United, taxiing out for departure. PSA called the tower and said 'Tower, this is United 586. We've got a little problem, so go ahead and let PSA go first.'

The tower promptly cleared PSA for takeoff before United had a chance to object to the impersonation.

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A DC-10 had an exceedingly long landing roll out after landing with his approach speed just a little too high...

San Jose Tower: 'American 751 Heavy, turn right at the end if able. If not able, take the Guadalupe exit off of Highway 101 back to the airport.'

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Tower: 'Eastern 702, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on 124.7.'

Eastern 702: 'Tower, Eastern 702 switching to Departure... by the way, as we lifted off, we saw some kind of dead animal on the far end of the runway.'

Tower: 'Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on 124.7... did you copy the report from Eastern?'

Continental 635: 'Continental 635, cleared for takeoff... and yes, we copied Eastern and we've already notified our caterers.'

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Editor's Note: Be sure to check out my blog at michael.bissell.conquent.com/blog -- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make the world... nutty.