Only for the truly demented...
You Will Need:
Felt markers or crayons, sticky-tape, construction paper, blunt scissors,
a parent's permission.
1) Place your hand flat on a sheet of construction paper.
2) Cut your hand off with the blunt scissors. The faster you go, the less
it will hurt!
3) Cauterize your stump on an electric burner. Ask your parents for help.
4) Decorate the hand to look like a turkey with the markers, paper and
sticky-tape. Gobble-gobble!
5) Hang your turkey on the front door with nails or a staple gun.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Buy my book!
Mundane Journeys through an Amazing World begins with Interstate 80. Not the most engaging topic, I know, but when you think about it, I-80 runs all the way across the North American continent linking San Francisco and New York. It's not just a ribbon of asphalt, it's a portal to far away, almost magical places.
My visits to major cities like Tokyo, London and Washington DC have been business affairs. I haven't rode a lot of roller coasters or ridden in open air buses, but I have visited with senators, bought yams from the back of a truck and barely escaped complete embarrassment when I was introduced to Matt Wiener in Vegas.
As I wrote the book I realized that over the years exotic, distant places have become more like the mundane places I've called home. But, as it turns out, there really aren't any mundane places, only mundane ways of looking at things.
If you have the cost of a latte and a Kindle, you can buy a copy at Amazon by
clicking here.
Or buy it in print!
Mundane Journeys Trade Paperback
Editor's Note: Be sure to check out my blog at
michaelbissell.com/blog -- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make
the world... nutty.
Today's blog: Being Watched by TV
Follow @bissell and @jokeindex on Twitter
