What does a Steeler fan say when he steps up to the microphone? "Would you like fries with that?"
Two Steelers fans walk past a bar. Hey, it could happen.
What do you call a Steeler fan without a girlfriend? Homeless.
What do you say to a Steeler fan wearing a suit? "Will the defendant please rise?"
What is the difference between a dead skunk in the middle of the road and a dead Steeler fan in the middle of the road? There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
How many Steeler fans does it take to change a light bulb? One, because they think if they simply hold onto the bulb the world will revolve around them.
Why did the Steelers fan demand his money back after seeing the Cher concert? He thought she was Troy Polamalu!
What are the best things about Pittsburgh? The airport and the interstate highway system. They help you leave there.
How does a Steeler fan deal with a "bad hair day?" Puts a shirt on!
A Steeler fan's wife greeted him at the door wearing a sexy negligee. Trouble is, she was coming in.
Why did Arnold Palmer move to Florida from Latrobe PA? To get away from the Steelers fans.
What did the Steeler fan do when he was given a pink slip? He put it on!
Did you hear the Pittsburgh schools had to cancel sex education classes for the week? Drivers' ed' needed the car.
Steeler fans looks like a bumblebees with a bad shave. The men look even worse.
Why did the Steeler fan grow a mustache? So he could look like his mother.
Where will the Pittsburgh Steelers sit during next year's Super Bowl? On their couches at home!
Buy my book!
Mundane Journeys through an Amazing World begins with Interstate 80. Not the most engaging topic, I know, but when you think about it, I-80 runs all the way across the North American continent linking San Francisco and New York. It's not just a ribbon of asphalt, it's a portal to far away, almost magical places.
My visits to major cities like Tokyo, London and Washington DC have been business affairs. I haven't rode a lot of roller coasters or ridden in open air buses, but I have visited with senators, bought yams from the back of a truck and barely escaped complete embarrassment when I was introduced to Matt Wiener in Vegas.
As I wrote the book I realized that over the years exotic, distant places have become more like the mundane places I've called home. But, as it turns out, there really aren't any mundane places, only mundane ways of looking at things.
If you have the cost of a latte and a Kindle, you can buy a copy at Amazon by
clicking here.
Or buy it in print!
Mundane Journeys Trade Paperback
Editor's Note: Be sure to check out my blog at
michaelbissell.com/blog -- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make
the world... nutty.
Today's blog: Being Watched by TV
Follow @bissell and @jokeindex on Twitter
