After the recent Anti-trust hearings, Bill Gates recently compared the software market with the soft drink market. He says Microsoft is struggling to survive but that the beverage giant will be on top forever because the Department of Justice doesn't pick on them. Of course, Bill should be careful not to give Coke any ideas. We might end up with a scenario like the following:
Joe: (walking into McDonalds) Hi, I'd like a Big Mac.
Cashier: Okay, here's your Big Mac and here's your Coke. That'll be $3.99.
Joe: Uh, I don't want a Coke.
Cashier: Sorry, they're bundled.
Joe: What? I'm not paying for a Coke!
Cashier: You don't; the Coke is free.
Joe: But wasn't a Big Mac $2.49 last week?
Cashier: Sure, but this latest Big Mac is far more innovative. It's got integrated Coke!
Joe: I already bought a Snapple across the street... I'm not going to drink the Coke.
Cashier: Then you can't have the burger.
Joe: Okay, fine, I will pay the $3.99 and throw the Coke away.
Cashier: Oh, you can't do that. They're seamlessly integrated. Totally inseparable.
Joe: How can that be? They're two totally separate things!
Cashier: No, watch. (takes Big Mac, dunks it in a tank of Coke) See?
Joe: Why did you just do that?!
Cashier: It's a benefit to the consumer. Otherwise you'd end up with two different, inconsistent tastes. This way you're assured of a continuous taste across all your foods.
Joe: Aaarrgh!
Buy my book!
Mundane Journeys through an Amazing World begins with Interstate 80. Not the most engaging topic, I know, but when you think about it, I-80 runs all the way across the North American continent linking San Francisco and New York. It's not just a ribbon of asphalt, it's a portal to far away, almost magical places.
My visits to major cities like Tokyo, London and Washington DC have been business affairs. I haven't rode a lot of roller coasters or ridden in open air buses, but I have visited with senators, bought yams from the back of a truck and barely escaped complete embarrassment when I was introduced to Matt Wiener in Vegas.
As I wrote the book I realized that over the years exotic, distant places have become more like the mundane places I've called home. But, as it turns out, there really aren't any mundane places, only mundane ways of looking at things.
If you have the cost of a latte and a Kindle, you can buy a copy at Amazon by
clicking here.
Or buy it in print!
Mundane Journeys Trade Paperback
Editor's Note: Be sure to check out my blog at
michaelbissell.com/blog -- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make
the world... nutty.
Today's blog: Being Watched by TV
Follow @bissell and @jokeindex on Twitter
