MS Antitrust Changes (G)
The Top 13 Changes at Microsoft as a Result of Antitrust Charges
13 Microsoft offices no longer providing toilet paper bearing Netscape logo.
12 Follow-up release to 'IE4' now being referred to internally as 'IE,5-10, with time off for good behavior.'
11 Before devouring competitors, must now say: 'pretty please with jam on top'
10 Cancellation of planned ad campaign: 'You'll think what we TELL you to think!'
9 Company United Way contributions redirected towards the 'Let's Buy The US Government' fund.
8 Plans quietly tabled to begin marketing: MSFood, MSClothing and MSShelter
7 10:00 AM: Barksdale visits Gates's office to sign landmark settlement agreement. 10:05 AM: Piranhas beneath trap door get some lunch.
6 Bumper stickers removed from corporate limousines which read. 'I don't break for software companies'
5 Internal memos no longer refer to Janet Reno as 'liquor addled she-male.'
4 Kick back for a while, let loser companies catch up.
3 Now relegated to making large piles of cash, down from huge buttwads of cash.
2 Using honesty, humility and cooperation, allow one small competitor to show a modest profit for three straight quarters. Then when they're lulled, club 'em to death like a baby seal.
1 Tables turned in jail, where Bill Gates has no choice but to have 'Big Louie's Inmate Explorer' installed against *his* will.
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Mundane Journeys through an Amazing World
begins with Interstate 80. Not the most engaging topic, I know, but when you think about it, I-80 runs all the way across the North American continent linking San Francisco and New York. It's not just a ribbon of asphalt, it's a portal to far away, almost magical places.
My visits to major cities like Tokyo, London and Washington DC have been business affairs. I haven't rode a lot of roller coasters or ridden in open air buses, but I have visited with senators, bought yams from the back of a truck and barely escaped complete embarrassment when I was introduced to Matt Wiener in Vegas.
As I wrote the book I realized that over the years exotic, distant places have become more like the mundane places I've called home. But, as it turns out, there really aren't any mundane places, only mundane ways of looking at things.
If you have the cost of a latte and a Kindle, you can buy a copy at Amazon by clicking here.
Or buy it in print! Mundane Journeys Trade Paperback
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