Jokeindex home

The Physics of Erecting a Christmas Tree (G)


More Stuff!
Jokeindex Home
G rated jokes
Christmas
Intellectual
The physics of standing a Christmas Tree seem to include chaos math, quantum relationships and a great deal of Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle.

- You can know the level of the base, but not the top.
- You can level the top of tree, but you won't know if the base is crooked.
- The placement of the legs changes the gravitational plane of the floor, no matter what way you turn the stand the tree is crooked.
- While the speed of light is constant, calculating the distribution of that light appears to be distorted by dark matter.
- The Christmas lights, like protons, flick in and out of existence, possibly shifting into other spatial dimensions.
- The cat has a equal chance of living or being killed as he gets in my way
- And as much Christmas cheer as a tree bring, I find myself overwhelmed by dark energy while I try to set up the tree.

May you have a high probability of a Merry Christmas.




Need a Video?: I produce interesting, easy to understand presenations for very complicated stuff. For example:



Learn more at michaelbissell.com

Editor's Note: Be sure to check out my blog at michaelbissell.com/blog -- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make the world... nutty.

Today's blog: Siri Being Disturbingly Helpful
Follow @bissell and @jokeindex on Twitter