10 Environmental Excuses for being a Lazy Slob (G)
1) It's not that I don't pull weeds, I'm just sequestering carbon.
2) I would take a shower but I'm saving water, and therefore energy, and therefore the world.
3) Getting a Big Gulp is buying in bulk, and we know that buying in bulk is not only fiscally responsible, but environmentally correct.
4) I'd go for a run but I don't want to contribute to CO2 emissions from my elevated breathing.
5) I'm not bumming a ride off you, I'm reducing my carbon footprint.
6) Playing video games all night means I'm using electricity during off peak hours and I'm helping to manage our energy resources.
7) My refrigerator is a celebration in biodiversity.
8) I'm wearing the same clothes as yesterday to help Reduce, Reuse, and Recycle.
9) I let my trash settle before sending it to the landfill where it would be trapped in an anaerobic environment and never decay.
10) Eating out of cardboard containers means I don't waste water and energy doing dishes.
Need a Video?: I produce interesting, easy to understand presenations for very complicated stuff. For example:
Be sure to check out my blog at
-- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make
the world... nutty.
Siri Being Disturbingly Helpful
Follow @bissell and @jokeindex on Twitter