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A few sex positions you may not know (X)


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Chinese Checkers:
Where you jump from hole to hole while jumping holes already filled a variation can be played with 2 people but it is much more recommended to play with 3+ people. In this game every one wins

Top Hat Monocle Position:
A higher class position sexual position in which a top hat and monocle are used. The imagination is used to make for a kinky sexual environment. A very passionate and energetic sex position.

WWF Champions:
When your in the 69 position and while a girl is sucking your dick you pick her up from the bed and piledrive her to the ground.

Sex Clown:
The act of suddenly and without warning blowing your load on a woman's breasts and face during sex, followed by a quick honking of her nose. The honking can be done simply for comedic effect, or, as an act of courtesy, to squeeze out any jizz that may have entered her nostrils. NOTE: the person on the receiving end may not put out for weeks after experiencing the sex clown.

Omega Position:
A sex move that collapses space-time to a single point which then expands and cools to form a new universe. (That's why they call it the 'big bang'.)

Simon Sex:
Having sex while the chosen partner; "Simon" gets to shout out different positions, and the other partner has less then 30 seconds to perform. Gets progressively tougher. If they fail they get punished (some people play to lose)

Rodeo Position:
When a man has sex with his woman in the Doggy Position, leans over and says "You know, your sister likes this position too." And tries to hang on for 8 seconds.

Canada's History:
The most gruesome sex act in the kama sutra that usually involves maple syrup, at least one moose, a duck, the Stanley Cup, and as many beavers as you'd like. This sex position is less popular than most others mainly because it is stickier than most, but is still gaining popularity in certain regions.

The Pirate:
While a man and woman are having sex, the man kicks the woman in the shin and cums in her eye. This causes her to yell "Arrrrr" and then wear an eye patch.

Meatloaf Pie Snatcher:
Quite possibly the only sex position ever known to get the red-headed cowboy off. At times taking up to 14 hours to complete, one must have the utmost stamina to perform the task. This is not for the light-hearted, as last week's lunch is normally involved. Originated in the heart of North Carolina, the first meatloaf pie snatcher ever performed created the loudest sonic boom, in this case referred to as "quantum stroke," ever recorded. Chuck Norris himself was said to have exclaimed, "damn, man!" To compete, Chuck then invented the Potroast Poledance, but no normal human has since replicated the feat, and the first three women involved perished, and roundhouse kicking may have been a factor.





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