Encounter in a Texas Bar (PG)
A Texan was having a drink at a bar with an old friend when he noticed a attractive and chesty young lady seated at the bar eating a hamburger.
As he held eye contact with her, she swallowed a bite and it must have gone down the wrong pipe for she began choking.
She was turning blue and obviously in serious respiratory distress.
The Texan said to his friend, 'That there gal is having a bad time!'
The other agreed and said, 'Think we should go help?'
'You bet,' and with that he ran over and said, 'Can you breathe????' She shook her head no. He said, 'Can you speak??' She again shook her head no. With that, he pulled up her skirt and licked her on the butt.
So shocked was the young woman that she coughed up the obstruction and began to breathe, with great relief.
Smiling to his friend, the Texan said, 'Funny how that Hind Lick maneuver always works'
Buy my book!
Mundane Journeys through an Amazing World
begins with Interstate 80. Not the most engaging topic, I know, but when you think about it, I-80 runs all the way across the North American continent linking San Francisco and New York. It's not just a ribbon of asphalt, it's a portal to far away, almost magical places.
My visits to major cities like Tokyo, London and Washington DC have been business affairs. I haven't rode a lot of roller coasters or ridden in open air buses, but I have visited with senators, bought yams from the back of a truck and barely escaped complete embarrassment when I was introduced to Matt Wiener in Vegas.
As I wrote the book I realized that over the years exotic, distant places have become more like the mundane places I've called home. But, as it turns out, there really aren't any mundane places, only mundane ways of looking at things.
If you have the cost of a latte and a Kindle, you can buy a copy at Amazon by clicking here.
Or buy it in print! Mundane Journeys Trade Paperback
Be sure to check out my blog at
-- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make
the world... nutty.
Today's blog: Historical Figures in Modern Clothes
Follow @bissell and @jokeindex on Twitter