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Unintentional MS Humor: [This really happened] (G)

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Editor's note: I usually say, "take it with a grain of salt" but I verified this with the gent who sent it in and I trust him. It happend.

I had a minor but vexing problem with Windows98 Second Edition in June 2000, so I navigated the MS-Maze(tm) at Once I was at a page that looked like it was suitable, I articulated my problem and clicked SUBMIT.

I got a nice reply which seemed sensible, but in the end didn't solve the problem. I let them know that the solution they offered didn't work. I went on to tell them that the process for getting their suggested solution (separate and apart from the fact that it was useless), by navigating a website with logins and passwords was pretty silly. Why not just send me an email?

I got This Reply [typos are left in because it shows this was from a real person who did not use/have a spell checker:

> > Delighting our customers is our top priority. We welcome your
> > comments and suggestions about how wecan imporve the support
> > we provide to you.
> >
> > We look forward to hearing from you.

Heh. If you know me at all, you know I did just that:

> Sirs:
> 1) The question was about running a simple DOS progam under Windows.
> 2) I think that it is absurd to have to access a website to get
> your answer to my question.
> 3) Your answer to my question is indistinguishable from an email,
> and does not look better or easier to understand on a website.
> 4) I feel it is absurd to lock this email on a web page that
> requires login and password that I am unlikely to ever use again.
> My question was as generic as can be. There is no need to place
> the discussion of this issue in a secure environment.
> 5) Your web server refused to recognize my login and my password, 24
> hours after accepting them.
> 6) It is my strong recommendation you award this systems designer and
> manager, "Dilbert PHB" Certificate for silly non-functional
> system of the week.
> 7) Kindly do not recommend that I should use a Microsoft Browser
> or email client to access your system.

[The login and password worked 24 hours later. They explained that the password database had crashed.]

Here is their NEXT reply:

> Hello :
> I apologize for the fact that we did not meet your expectations in this
> particular instance. My goal as a Manager is to make sure that every
> customer receives the service they deserve.
> Please accept my apologies!!

Well not being one to let a straight line like that pass I replied:

> Hi there Customer Feedback for PSS Customers, good to hear from you.
> Thank you for your kind note. I shall take it in the spirit in
> which it was sent.
> Warm regards,

I take old Starbucks Drink Cups and
turn them into Lamps

The warm panels are made from melting down old Starbucks drink cups, but it looks and feels like mica or some organic material. The wood in the lampshade and base is pulled from our 100 year old house in Astoria Oregon during a remodel, and it all comes together for a beautiful, classic look.

Check it out!

Editor's Note: Be sure to check out my blog at -- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make the world... nutty.

Today's blog: Terms of Service in lieu of Legal Governance
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