Two guys are out one day golfing. One slices off to the right, one hooks off to the left and they both go to retrieve their balls. The guy on the right is hacking and hacking at the ball but just can't lift it out of the buttercups. It has become lodged in. All of a sudden, up from the ground comes Mother Nature and is she mad!
"What the hell are you doing to my beautiful buttercups?" she asks.
"I'm just trying to get my golf ball out of them, lady", replies the golfer.
"Well, you are really making me mad. Just look what you've done to my buttercups. For this I must punish you. Your punishment will be an entire year without butter!!"
The golfer starts laughing hysterically which by now has just about worn out Mother Nature's patience.
"What in the hell do you think is so funny about no butter for a year?" she screams at him.
"I'm not laughing about that - I'm laughing about my friend over there whacking the hell out of your pussy willows!
I take old Starbucks Drink Cups and turn them into Lamps
The warm panels are made from melting down old Starbucks drink cups, but it looks and feels like mica or some organic material. The wood in the lampshade and base is pulled from our 100 year old house in Astoria Oregon during a remodel, and it all comes together for a beautiful, classic look.
Editor's Note: Be sure to check out my blog at
michaelbissell.com/blog -- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make
the world... nutty.