A sermon on temperance (G)
A preacher was completing a sermon on temperance. With great expression he said, "If I had all the beer in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river!"
The congregation nodded their approval. With even greater emphasis the preacher added, "And if I had all the wine in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river, too!"
The people clapped and said, "AMEN."
"And if I had all the whiskey in the world," said the preacher, "I'd take it and throw it into the river!"
As the reverend sat down, the song leader then stood very cautiously and announced with a smile, "For our closing song, let us sing Hymn 365: 'Shall We Gather at the River.'"
Buy my book!
Mundane Journeys through an Amazing World
begins with Interstate 80. Not the most engaging topic, I know, but when you think about it, I-80 runs all the way across the North American continent linking San Francisco and New York. It's not just a ribbon of asphalt, it's a portal to far away, almost magical places.
My visits to major cities like Tokyo, London and Washington DC have been business affairs. I haven't rode a lot of roller coasters or ridden in open air buses, but I have visited with senators, bought yams from the back of a truck and barely escaped complete embarrassment when I was introduced to Matt Wiener in Vegas.
As I wrote the book I realized that over the years exotic, distant places have become more like the mundane places I've called home. But, as it turns out, there really aren't any mundane places, only mundane ways of looking at things.
If you have the cost of a latte and a Kindle, you can buy a copy at Amazon by clicking here.
Or buy it in print! Mundane Journeys Trade Paperback
Be sure to check out my blog at
-- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make
the world... nutty.
Today's blog: The New Facebook is Text Messaging
Follow @bissell and @jokeindex on Twitter