This girl is feeling a bit down in the dumps and decides to treat herself to a meal at the Ritz. She manages to get a table that very night and enjoys a delicious meal on her own, nothing too extravagant but nice all the same. The head waiter brings the bill and she's horrified to see the total: 150 quid! She didn't expect this at all and asks the waiter "Would you mind holding my breasts while I write the cheque please?"
The head waiter is taken aback. In all his years in the job he's never been asked that before, but always eager to please the customer, (And a free 'feel-up' into the bargain) he obliges. She gets up to leave and the waiter is still perplexed.
His curiosity gets the better of him and he catches up with her at the door, "I'm sorry to bother you Miss but I'd like to know why you asked me to do that just now."
"Oh it's quite simple really" she replies "I love to have my breasts held when I'm being screwed!!!"
Buy my book!
Mundane Journeys through an Amazing World
begins with Interstate 80. Not the most engaging topic, I know, but when you think about it, I-80 runs all the way across the North American continent linking San Francisco and New York. It's not just a ribbon of asphalt, it's a portal to far away, almost magical places.
My visits to major cities like Tokyo, London and Washington DC have been business affairs. I haven't rode a lot of roller coasters or ridden in open air buses, but I have visited with senators, bought yams from the back of a truck and barely escaped complete embarrassment when I was introduced to Matt Wiener in Vegas.
As I wrote the book I realized that over the years exotic, distant places have become more like the mundane places I've called home. But, as it turns out, there really aren't any mundane places, only mundane ways of looking at things.
If you have the cost of a latte and a Kindle, you can buy a copy at Amazon by clicking here.
Or buy it in print! Mundane Journeys Trade Paperback
Be sure to check out my blog at
-- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make
the world... nutty.
Today's blog: Being Watched by TV
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