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I am Clinton of Borg.
You will not really be assimilated, exactly...

I am Janet Reno of Borg.
Resisters will be barbecued. Waco is irrelevant.

I am Stephanopolous of Borg.
It's not assimilation, it's diversity...

I am Regan of Borg.
Prepare to be ... uh, I don't recall.

I am GaGa of Borg.
Resistance turns me on.

I am Kojak of Borg.
Who loves to assimilate ya, baby.

I am Ginsu of Borg.
You WILL be ASSIMILATED, but wait! That's not all!

I am Hamlet, of Borg!
Prepare to be...or not to be...

I am Oprah of Borg.
So, why did you assimilate your husband?

I am Lancelot of Borg.
Resistance is feudal.

I am Haskell of Borg.
You resist well, Mrs. Cleaver.

I am Lennon of Borg.
Imagine there's no assimilation...

I am Baez of Borg.
What if we gave an assimilation and nobody came?

I am Opie of Borg.
Can I assimilate 'em, Pa?

I am Quayle of Borg.
Speling is irelevante.

I am Smorgas of Borg.
You will be marinated.

I am Fonda of Borg.
After assimilation, you will have Buns of Steel.

Buy my book!
Mundane Journeys through an Amazing World begins with Interstate 80. Not the most engaging topic, I know, but when you think about it, I-80 runs all the way across the North American continent linking San Francisco and New York. It's not just a ribbon of asphalt, it's a portal to far away, almost magical places.

My visits to major cities like Tokyo, London and Washington DC have been business affairs. I haven't rode a lot of roller coasters or ridden in open air buses, but I have visited with senators, bought yams from the back of a truck and barely escaped complete embarrassment when I was introduced to Matt Wiener in Vegas.

As I wrote the book I realized that over the years exotic, distant places have become more like the mundane places I've called home. But, as it turns out, there really aren't any mundane places, only mundane ways of looking at things.

If you have the cost of a latte and a Kindle, you can buy a copy at Amazon by clicking here.

Or buy it in print! Mundane Journeys Trade Paperback

Editor's Note: Be sure to check out my blog at -- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make the world... nutty.

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